Support those with mental illnesses

Why do we struggle to understand mental illness? Is it because it's so complicated it overwhelms us? Is it because we want to sound tough, insisting, "Ah, they're just weak. They've gotta toughen up?" Or is it because its residue can be too gut-wrenching to dwell upon? Whatever the case may be, perhaps we should take a good, long look at our stance and try to understand mental illness better. Why? There are two reasons I can think of: • First, the families of those inflicted need our empathy and support. • Second, if it hits close to home, we'll be better prepared to meet our own family challenges. Like this: For over 10 years, her marriage is about as solid as it gets. Without warning, her husband nosedives into clinical depression but is wise enough to seek help. The final diagnosis: He's bipolar. How does the mother of two react? Does she run and hide, chastise or bail on her wedding vows? Nope, not a chance. Her integrity will not allow it. To better understand her husband's prognosis, she studies the disease. To better understand her place in his recovery and what's in store for their future, she, too, seeks professional help. She also prays for her marriage, prays for her children, prays for his recovery and prays for their strength. To cope with the inherent challenges ahead, she joins a support group and develops a network of family, friends, counselors, doctors and those experiencing the same trauma. The results: Together, they keep rowing the boat of hope. Together, they keep the oars of faith moving forward — sometimes upstream and sometimes down, but they keep on rowing. With a determination few will understand, she settles in for the long haul, stays positive, and invests--heavily--in her husband and their family. Comedian Jim Carrey battled clinical depression. He's had a good run at making people laugh. Author Charles Dickens, known as a literary genius, struggled with mental illness. He managed to write a world-class novel or two. Isaac Newton was stricken with autism, schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, but that didn't stop him from inventing calculus, explaining gravity, building telescopes and a multitude of other scientific achievements. I'll give you two-to-one odds, Carry, Dickens and Newton had support, love, and a powerful charge of respect from someone in their lives. I'm quite certain you don't make a difference in this world without it. Let me be so bold as to suggest a prescription to help a person fight mental illness: At the very least, I'd prescribe a large dose of love, an injection of persistent empathy and a consistent, long-range therapy plan designed to help row that boat of faith and hope in the same, respectful direction. It's a simple prescription, maybe not too clinical an approach, but, from my perspective, a damn good one. Tony Legando is a lifelong educator, a hall of fame football coach, author of "To Lead a Good Life" and a speaker who has inspired leaders for many years. Check out his website at tonylegando.com or contact him at legandot@gmail.com.