Learn to be proud of yourself

Are you proud of yourself? Did you grimace when you read that question? Or did you smile? It is a general question to ask. If you are not proud of yourself then I hope you will learn to be. Being proud of who you are, what you do, or do not do, is a process all of us would benefit to learn. There is a difference between celebrating your accomplishments and being boastful. Being proud is different than prideful. Being proud is an internal belief of who you are, what you feel about you, the choices you make, the actions you take, the direction you are going. Be proud of the small and the big accomplishments. I ask you again, are you proud of yourself? Personally, I have no problem sharing how proud I am of my children. When they accomplish something, master a new skill, I smile, I praise, I celebrate. When it comes to myself, I tend to hide. I purchased a Peloton bike, and a few weeks ago I achieved a personal record. I took a picture of my accomplishment and I shared with my friends. I shared because I was proud, I shared because my instructor encouraged me to pat myself on the back, I shared with a smile and I am proud I did. I was proud of myself, I recognized it and I am learning it is okay. We all have something to be proud of and often we are afraid to give ourselves the credit we deserve, the well-deserved pat on the back. Possibly we do not want to be judged, criticized, or viewed as the prideful individual who is gloating. Or is it the lack of self-esteem, the level of worth and confidence we have within ourselves? I was raised with the idea that "people are watching you," that whatever choice I make someone, somewhere will notice and develop an opinion of me as a result. Translation: Choose my words and actions carefully. Then I became a mom and the most important opinions out there are those of my own children. I know they are watching what I do and say and the interactions I have within my home, community, and the world. I want to be proud of my children, but I need to recognize that I am the one responsible for teaching them. I need to treat myself like I want my kids to be treated. I need to treat others how I want my children to treat them. You are someone to be proud of. Give yourself permission to be proud. Treat yourself the same you want your friends and loved ones to be treated. Consider the struggles you have had, recognize what you have already overcome. Give yourself some credit Learn how to forgive yourself for what you have done or wish to be different. We all have dark secrets, moments that we took the easy way out, or something we are ashamed to admit. Forgive yourself and allow yourself the opportunity to do better, to move forward and improve. Remember you are not doing yourself or anyone else a favor by dwelling on that one event and beating yourself up over it. You regret it, okay, move on and be proud of what you do the next time. At the end of the day no matter what we think we wanted, it is rooted in being proud. At the end of the day, when you lay your head on the pillow are you proud of the choices you made? Are you proud of the words used? Or the silence that remains? Are you proud of what you have done for yourself? Proud of how you treated others? There is no shame in being proud. Be proud of who you are, what you have overcome. Be proud of the people around you, the ones who instill the traits you admire, compliment them, praise them, model the kindness and then do the same for yourself. Sandusky native Rachel Velishek is a licensed Professional Clinical Counselor ( LPCC) with more than more than 11 years of professional experience providing clinical diagnostic assessment, psychotherapy for all ages, and relational counseling She lives in Columbus and works at Licking Memorial Health Systems.